Before we get to the Week 17 NFL Picks, I figured we would close the decade out by answering a few twitter questions. As always, please remember that all of these questions came from an actual "Informer burner account" on Twitter.
I hope you are entertained.
Hey Informer the season is almost over, are you going to hand out awards? Who is your MVP, Coach of year, rookie of year, fantasy bust & mvp, defensive player of the year, etc?— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
My awards are:
MVP: Lamar Jackson - Anyone who does not vote Lamar the NFL MVP this season deserves to loose there ballot.
Coach of Year: John Harbaugh - When you have the best record in football because you design a system around your players -- instead of trying to make players fit "your system" -- then you automatically get to be The Informer's COY.
Rookie of the Year: AJ Brown - With all due respect to Josh Jacobs, Kyler Murray, Danny Dimes, Gunner Milksteak and the other great 2019 rookies; AJ Brown has the resume to win ROY and he is actually playing on a playoff team. So he gets my vote.
Offensive Player of the Year: Michael Thomas - Anytime you break Marvin Harrison's NFL record for most catches in a single season you are going to win The Informer's Offensive Player of the Year Award.
Defensive Player of the Year: Ummm . . .I don't watch defense so I guess I'll go with one of the Bosa brothers or a Watt. You guys pick.
NFL Handicapper of the Year: I don't want to toot this guys horn to much, but The Informer is currently 136-99-5 against the spread (which according to NFL pick watch dot com makes him #1 on the internet amongst all experts). So I guess I really have no choice but to give The Informer "The Informer's handicapper of the year" award.
Informer do you have any New Years resolutions heading into 2020?— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
I have five:
- Drink all the Natties
- Eat all the Blimpies
- Put Ketchup on my steak
- Write more blogs
- Post more Twitter Poll Tournaments.
Informer the decade is over in a few days, so with that in mind do you have any Mount Rushmore or Top 10 lists of the decade?— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
Sure why not.
Mount Rushmore of Movies:
- Fast & Furious 5
- Fast & Furious 6
- Fast & Furious 7
- Fate of the Furious
Movies not named Fast & Furious:
- The Town
- Warrior
- The Dark Knight
- Super Troopers 2
Fast Food Places
- Blimpies
- Casey's Pizza
- Taco Bell
- Jersey Mike's
- Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia
- Blue Bloods
- Chicago PD
- Gotham
- Miley Cyrus- Nothing Breaks Like a Heart
- Florida Georgia Line - May We All
- Brantley Gilbert - Bottoms Up
- Cole Swindell - You Should Be Here
QB: Tom Brady
RB: Adrian Peterson
RB: Marshawn Lynch
WR: Julio Jones
WR: Calvin Johnson
Slot WR: Julian Edelman
TE: Gronk
Defense: Again, The Informer don't watch no defense. You guys can pick.
Is it true you had a chance to win your Super picks contest but you choked it all away in Week 17?— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
I can't see the future, but sadly this feels about right.
(My Super Picks as of writing this blog - Bears, Titans, Eagles, Packers, 49ers. Just know these picks will probably get changed to Ravens, Rams, Eagles, Packers, 49ers. Or maybe Ravens, Rams, Colts, Pats, Packers. Basically I have no freaking clue what to do. I just know if I go 5-0 and I am going to make money. #DefGonnaChoke #ClassicInformer)
Informer choose now: Mahomes or Lamar Jackson for the next 10 seasons?— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
Good gosh man. Why don't you just say I can never drink Natty Lights again. At least that wouldn't be so painful.
(The Informer note - I take Mahomes because I love Mahomes, but f-word that is a tough call. )
Do you want AJ Green to leave Cincinnati?— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
Ummm . . .Did you all see that Burrow guy throwing the football for LSU yesterday? Heck no I don't want AJ to leave the Bengals. He is about to be playing with the greatest quarterback in NFL history not named Mahomes. That has to be a good for "The Sickness".
Who is your Top 5 fantasy players at each position heading into 2020?— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
QB:
- Mahomes
- Lamar Jackson
- DeShaun Watson
- Matt Ryan
- Kyler Murray/Russ Wilson
- Run CMC
- Saquon Barkley
- Alvin Kamara
- Derrick Henry
- Nick Chubb
- Michael Thomas
- Julio Jones
- DeAndre Hopkins
- AJ Green
- Tyreke Hill
- Travis Kelce
- George Kittle
- Zack Ertz
- Hunter Henry
- Noah Fant
Dear Mr Informer, what is your Top 5 favorite podcast on the internet right now? Please provide links as well.— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
In no particular order (I love them all equally like one loves their children equally):
- The Bill Simmons Podcast
- The Ryen Russillo Podcast
- The Rewatchables
- The Big Red Cobcast
- Crackin' Naties' (Seriously the funniest podcast on the net)
Informer what is your Mount Rushmore of video games?— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
This was one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make. I am not kidding. In the end I went:
- Ken Griffey Jr Baseball (SNES)
- Tecmo Super Football (NES)
- Madden (PS3 & PS4)
- NCAA College Football (PS2 & PS3)
Hey yo Informer, what is your favorite memory of December 29th?— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
With all due respect to the time my brother Matty was born on December 29th, I am going with Randy Moss doing Randy Moss things while leading the Pats to a 16-0 record and breaking the NFL record for touchdown catches in a season.
As you can see The Informer only needs four wins to reach 140 correct picks on the season for the second time in his career. The Informer also needs to go 5-0 in his Super Picks contest to win money to buy the wife's mini van a new transmission. So needless to say, we might as well just go 16-0 today. Seems like that would be the perfect solution to The Informer's problems.Informer you are 12-3-1 on the season handing out winning picks, so I gotta ask who do you got in Week 17?— notTheRealInformersBurnerAccount (@NotInformers) December 29, 2019
So with that in mind, here are The Informer's Week 17 NFL Picks. As always, please remember these picks are only to be used for illegal gambling purpose. Any other use without the express written consent of The Informer is totally not strictly prohibited because this is a blog and no one is reading anyways.
#Yolo
THE PICKS:
Titans (-8.5)
Bengals (+3)
Bears (-3)
Colts (-6.5)
Falcons (+1)
Redskins (+13)
Panthers (+14)
Eagles (-4)
Ravens (PK)
Jets (PK)
Patriots (-16.5)
Packers (-12.5)
Chargers (+10.5)
Rams (-7.5)
49ers (-3.5)
Raiders (+3.5)
That is a wrap on another winning season. Good luck Week 17 y'all. I hope your Sunday is filled with Natty Lights, winning parlays, Super Pick Contest wins and all the illegal gambling money you're heart desires.
In the words of Bill Belichick: "We are on to 2020".
Informer Out.
2019 NFL PICKS RECORD
Overall - 136-99-5
Last Week - 8-7-1
Winning Weeks - 12-3-1
